


The First Fight

by Amelia Abernathy (authr2b)



Category: Welcome to Night Vale
Genre: Fluffy, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-20
Updated: 2014-01-20
Packaged: 2018-01-09 09:29:53
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,476
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1144351
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/authr2b/pseuds/Amelia%20Abernathy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>What happens when Carlos gets tired of Cecil talking about their love life on the radio? Something so absurdly normal that it shocks the eccentric Cecil.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The First Fight

Carlos

 

        “Will you stop talking about our love life on the radio!?!” I yelled at Cecil as I walked in the door to his (extremely cluttered) apartment. He turned to me, a cup of coffee in one hand, a slice of Big Rico’s in the other.

            “Why? Everyone loves it?” He replied simply. He sipped on the coffee as I attempted to calm myself.

            “Because, I went to the grocery store today and a few very nice young men asked me how well I slept last night. The other asking if I had _blood issues_ keeping me awake. You do realize what they were talking about right? Because I didn’t until I got back to the lab and my co-workers said you’d given a to in-detail description of what we did after our date.” I said. I glared at him. He put down the food and turned to me.

            “Listen, it’s not my fault you’re amazing and I can’t help it if it all comes out.” He said.

            “BUT YOU DON’T TRY TO KEEP IT FROM COMING OUT!” I shouted. He pursed his lips and cocked his hip like some teenage cheerleader.

            “Are you suggesting I kiss and tell?” he asked.

            The lack of a sense for the obvious that resides in the general populous on Night Vale, as well as the general lack of concern, has become my pet peeve over the years. Like the time a giant worm shot out of the ground, ate the library, and nobody even gave a rat’s ass. I mean, really, how many worms can grow that large, grow teeth, and go back into the same hole with a building in its maw?

            “I don’t have to suggest it. I have evidence saying you do!” I said, throwing my arms in the air. “I have recordings of you describing, in detail, every single thing that happened with us. We need privacy!”

            “There is no such thing as privacy! The secret police can probably see and hear everything that happens between us!” he yelled back. The eye on his forehead starting to pop out of socket.

            “Just because the secret police know doesn’t mean that ALL OF NIGHT VALE NEEDS TO!” Cecil crossed his arms across his chest, pivoted to face the hallway. He stuck his long nose into the air and huffed like a jilted young woman.

            “Well then, I guess I won’t bother to mention you on the show!” he said snootily. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw his little beagle, Apache, trot out of the living room.

            “Good! I never wanted to be mentioned!” I shouted. I turned and started to march out the door, when, behind me, I heard Cecil turn just enough to face the door.

            “Humph, you just try that, you’ll be wishing you hadn’t said any of that and you’ll come craaaaawling back to me in half-an-hour. And that’s when I lost it.

            “I won’t because _I’m_ an adult man, and you’re nothing but a tween-aged girl!” I heard him gasp behind me, and I marched straight out the door and slammed it behind me. I heard a loud yelp, and Cecil having a hissy fit over what I guessed to be Apache’s paw/ear/tail caught in the door.

            I stormed down the stairs and out into the road, careful to stay on the side walk on the _other_ side of the dog park. Of course, everyone else needing to walk was on that side of the road, but when they saw how mad I was, they parted like the Red Sea for Moses. One person stuck out their finger and laughed at me, and I vaguely remember biting the finger.

            I finally reached my house and slammed the door behind me. I wanted to piss him off as much as possible, but how? I ran my fingers through my hair, thinking. Then I stopped, my hands still in my hair, and grinned.

            He loved my hair. I took my hand out of my hair and bolted into the storage closet. After rummaging around for half an hour, I found it. my old electric razor. I collected the cord in my hand and made my way to the bathroom.

            I plugged it into the wall and turned it on. For a second, it didn’t respond. Then the handle started humming and the blades started to move.

            I looked at myself in the mirror, wondering if it made me a bad person if I did this. Then I remembered all the jeering and laughing that had been caused by Cecil’s tendancy to gush.

            So I pushed my hair off of my forehead and brought the buzzing razor up to start shearing it all off.

 

 

 

 

Cecil

 

            I went to work the next day mildly depressed. Carlos hadn’t called or shown up after our fight yesterday. And it really was the first time we’d raised our voices at each other. My eyes still stung when I thought of him calling me a girl. I passed by the new intern, I don’t know his name, I haven’t really bothered for a while, cause they all just disappear. I went into the recording booth and started the show.

            I’d been doing the show for a while when, in my headset, I heard the new intern say, “Uh, Cecil? You need to come in here and see this…” I frowned as I continued the story on Jocie’s new “angel cat,” but I wrapped up the story and finished with announcing the weather. The intern turned on the song and I exited the recording booth, and I swear to God, or whatever diety exits, I could have died.

            Carlos stood in the break room, triumphant smile on his perfect face, his arms crossed, and his beautiful, perfect hair, gone. A shiny, perfectly shaped bald head, replaced it. he uncrossd his arms and held up a Ziploc bag, with his hair in it. I bliked away tears…

            And opened my eyes, looking at the ceiling and the concerned faces of carlos and the Intern, Bobby, according to his name tag.

            “Cecil? Cecil are you okay?” carlos asked. I groaned.

            “Your hair! Your perfect hair!” I moaned. Intern Bobby got up and walked over to the control board.

            “Cecil, we’ve only got a few seconds left on the weather.” Bobby said as Carlos pulled me up.

            “I didn’t think you’d pass out.” He said.

            “Cecil!” Bobby said. Carlos pushed me into the booth.

            I sat down in my chair and sobbed the rest of the news.

            “Stay- stay tuned dear listeners, for a two hour long special, of the sounds of broken hearts. Good Night, Night Vale. Good Night.” I took off my headset and walked back in to the break room. Carlos held out a cup of coffee in his, beautiful, right hand.

            “Seriously, Cecil, I wouldn’t have done it if you would faint at the sight of it.” he said to me, his lovely baritone voice ringing in my ears, attempting to sooth me.

            “It’s all gone! Why?” I asked. He gave me a look that said I should know.

            “Because, how you feel right now is how you feel every time you bring our private life. You needed to understand.” He said, taking my hand in his. I sighed.

            “I’m sorry.” I said. “But, I just thought…”

            “How about this,” Carlos interrupted, taking the coffee from my hand, and putting both of our cups on the counter. He turned back and took both of my hands in his. “I will promise not to do anything like this ever again, and you promise to not talk about our love, or sex, life on the show.” He suggested.

            “All right. I promise I said. he smiled and promised to. And we hugged and we stood there, and it was almost a perfect moment. Except, his perfect, wonderful, beautiful hair, was still gone.

            “Oh! I almost forgot!” He said, pulling away for a moment. I stared at him as he reached up to his bald head, and… pulled off the skin?

            But Oh Happy Day! His perfect hair came flowing out, all of it, in its jet black glory.

            “But… But…” I started, words failing me.

            “I started to shave it off, but remembered that I had a bald-cap from a Halloween costume I did in high school. so I shave my side burns and put it on, I didn’t want you to be hurt that badly.” He said. then my awe turned to rage. Which Carlos saw in my eyes. I launched myself at him, but he darted under me and bolted out the door.

            I gave chase as Intern Bobby laughed. Don’t get me wrong. I love the fact that his perfect hair was still there, but he did still get rid of some of it…


End file.
